Still Locked Down

Some days I find it hard to be on lock down. Not sure why. Since I live alone, I experience almost complete isolation from human contact. I take short walks with a neighbor and I buy a newspaper most days (but only one person in the shop at a time).

That’s it, for in-person interaction. It is enough, but only just. Connecting with people is the emotional juice and energy that restores and invigorates all life!

Plenty of internet socializing though… Chats with friends. My book club has gone online. Family+friend dinners several nights. My good friend Anne and I continue to video chat on Thursday, which we’ve kept going for a couple years.

Plus endless texts and newspaper articles and funny/wonderful videos. Some days it’s way too much: Too many social engagements. Too many emails. Too many tests and funny videos. Hard to be my normal introvert hermit. On Sunday, I took a day without news. Whew.

But I’ve been reading the Italian newspapers most days and my Italian gets better…

In the physical world, my life is very contained. I run up the hilly roads behind the house and hike some of the hill trails with my neighbor, although we are cutting that back after a fellow in a small village we passed through yelled at us. Plus the fines have gone up to E500.

Note: the statue of the twisted person in the left is my mom’s sculpture.

I ride my bike to the store, which takes 15 mins across fields and along water ditches.

I do yoga and other workouts in my living room.

The psychic unease is sometimes great. I’ve got complete freedom. I don’t even need to stress about filing taxes in April. All my trips have been cancelled. No need to rush anywhere since everywhere is closed. No need to clean my house or put gas in the car or make it a gym class.

So I could just lounge in bed… Ouch!!. I’ve got some projects that give me pleasure and structure. I’m just finishing up a mammoth project of photobooks for all my Bicycle Adventure Club trips. One each for Piedmont, Le Marche, France, and three for the Israel-Jordan trip (Petra and Wadi Rum get one for themselves!). I’ve also done a 80-pager for the bits and bobs of my life in Italy. It’s made me plow through all my photos in the last three years and make decisions about which are good (enough) and which are rubbish (most). Very fun. Very time consuming.

Coming up over the next few weeks is a new group. My friend Emily is setting up a weekly forum for poetry. I’d like to join them, so I’ll have to write some poetry. Or at least read some I can share. I’ve been wanting to do this, so it fits in well.

Having said all this, since I’m an introvert at heart (maybe an “ambivert” overall), on some days I revel in the soliture, the lack of obligations. This can be an incredible time of opportunity and self-challenge. I can finally unpack and organize all my mom’s leftovers and my own already-way-too-much stuff. I can take tiny steps into learning to draw and paint. I can write, prose and poetry, without interruption. I can build a daily practice of self care that’s quiet and reflective. I can learn to cook more adventurously (disasters can be tossed!).

I derive great comfort from the idea that the new case numbers are slowing and reducing here in Italy. It isn’t a solid drop, but they do indeed seem to have peaked. I haven’t heard an ambulance in a couple days, whereas last week they were going by all too frequently. On Sunday evening, the bells in the nearby Capezzano Pianore church are ringing. Are they bidding farewell to a parishioner who’s died or is the the normal Sunday series of rings? They have rung a lot many days. If I’m riding past (to get my newspaper), I stop to watch the huge bells fling themselves outside the tower. No electronic substitutes here.

This lockdown has been hard on everyone and people are less friendly, more cautious. If I pass someone on a walk, they move to the other side of the road and don’t smile.

Today it’s very windy and chilly. And will be for a while. But Spring will not be stopped. Flowers are coming out, buds are sprouting on trees, local farmers have plowed their fields. And strawberries are coming into season. Delicious!

This too shall pass.

13 Replies to “Still Locked Down”

  1. I’m glad you found it useful. I just feel so unsettled sometimes and this seemed a good way to free that distress.I feel calmer now. 🙂

  2. Sanborn, thank you for sharing your insights. I feel like you should publish this somewhere. This too shall pass.

  3. Thanks for sharing these daily events with us. It helps us over here too.

  4. Loved this Sanborn. So many of the same things I am experiencing. It must be a bit harder for you being away from CA where you have lived for so long, but at the same time, you can delve into your new life-space. I’m not seeing many friends, but am getting together with a select few for a run, hike, or bike. I love seeing the pics of your renovated place! Can’t wait to visit. Do you have a TV there? Just curious. I think you took me running along that bike path! Glad I have the memories-

  5. thank you for this, it reflects much of what I am feeling on the other side of the world, expressed so well

  6. Glad to hear that you’re surviving and thanks for sharing your routine. Gives me ideas on how to survive another week and a half in quarantine. We can’t go out yet but when we do we will bike and hike with social distance. Seems like the Covid infections in Italy are flattening while in Spain and the US in particular NY are still peaking. Hopefully, Italy will emerge from this soon.

  7. Nice to read how you are filling your days. I hope the return point is coming and normal life will soon start again. Un abbraccio

  8. Nice to see how you’re doing. Don’t consider you an introvert! All governors here seem to be issuing stay home/lock down orders. Luckily we can still hike and ride for the moment. Spent the day organizing and filing 4 years of ride info in one place for future reference. No more just completed or pending zones. Would you consider letting me buy copies of the photo books from the rides we’ve shared? Not only did I not have time to take many pictures, but the phone that Woody had all his pictures on died beyond recovery.

    Maybe learning how to effeciently share my photos from the phone to the computer will be my next project. Be well.

  9. I’ll get you copies of the books. They’ve been a terrific project. I’ve spent countless hours remembering our trips and the good times we had.

  10. Hi Sanborn, Thanks for sharing your post. You have been quite productive with your time! I am impressed. I like seeing the pictures and descriptions of you life and habitat. Jim and I thankful we can still ski and ride bikes here. Other than that all our time is spent at home. We have endless projects waiting for our attention. I love that you did photo books of our trips. Woody and Marnie were here to ski with us the end of February. Great to hear from you.

  11. Thanks for being so honest. I am busy working so have plenty of interaction with people but afree with you people outside when i walk Zac no longer smile. Some insist on me crossing the road to avoid them…they are going to continue walking 2 or 3 in a group and not move away. Young people still playing football or other games all close together.
    Thankfully spring continue i can see trees ready to unfurl their leaves and flowers. And hear birds singing.
    Buying more books to read.
    I too check the Italy figures and breathe a little better now figures have started to fall even if they are still too many.

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